Friday night, Leiden, The NL, 10/10/25
It’s Friday night in Leiden, and I’m on an artist date as we speak.
I’m following my weekly orders from The Artist's Way, a programme I’m doing as an attempt to get my creative mojo back (more info at end of blog).
One of the weekly tasks is to take your "artist self" on a solo date, with the same care you’d extend to a romantic one. The idea is to nurture your creative consciousness, your inner artist.
You’re supposed to imagine yourself, with your artist self.
I’ve gone for the most typical first-date kind of date: I’ve brought my artist to a bar.
Actually an Irish sports bar.
I don't think it's impressing her much.
But it's not too bad, I like it, even if it's a bit rowdy.
It’s in the middle of Leiden, with a nice terrace on the canal. But it’s cold and getting dark, so I’m tucked into a quiet corner inside, by myself.
I’m going to a Meetup event in about 25 minutes, a Prosecco tasting, so I brought myself here first for a quick date.
My artist isn’t impressed with that either. I can feel her rolling her eyes at my low effort. Oops.
Maybe I like this place because when I was young, I loved being out and about. Simply hanging out at bars like this one. Sipping on a beer out in the world felt adventurous.
Back then I used to desperately crave something to happen, to bump into an acquaintance, to meet a new crush, to be invited to join at the next bar, to spark up a chat to the table next to me, just anything to happen.
On wilder nights, moving from bars to clubs, or to after parties, I would get inspired by the chaos, romanticising the highs and the lows, the dancing, the blurriness, the heartbreak. I found all of it so bloody exciting.
Saying all of that, yeah, I used to enjoy hanging out at bars lol.
But I’ve stopped doing it, regularly at least. Maybe I should do this more again, the new scenery is quite refreshing.
I look around and realise I’m probably bringing down the Friday night vibes by lurking in the corner writing in my sketchbook. Sorry guys.
They’re playing Rolling Stones now.
I can’t get no, sa-tis-fac-tion
'Cause I tried, and I tried, and I tried, and I tried
I can't get no
I can't get no
Oh, this moment right here, the perfect soundtrack as I write these words in the light of the candle, and the fruit machine, it's like a movie. I smile guiltily. It seems I am still romanticising.
And dare I say, this moment makes me feel young again. Okay, fine, I admit it, I like a little taste of the good ol days. But just a little tasty taste, you know.
Going back to the bloody storyline of why I’m here, I’m on an artist date.
Apparently it’s good for inspiration.
"Soo, what inspires you?" I ask, all of a sudden, startling my artist.
I'm finally giving my poor neglected artist some attention. I’ve been rudely ignoring her since we got here, lost in thought, reminiscing.
I go on.
"Why have you stopped creating so much? Why do you have so many doubts about your art, your writing, your potential? And why do you struggle so much with it all?”
I realise I’m going to full-on, too fast. This date isn’t going well. I’m scaring her away.
"Soo, tell me a bit about yourself", I decide to take a step back, keep it casual. I laugh awkwardly, taking a sip of Heineken (I’m not a beer snob).
Blank stare.
''Well, what would you like to be in the future?”, this time I ask nicely, with my sweetest most innocent voice.
"I want to do lot's of things. I just want to explore, to feel free."
She goes on.
“I love nature, and the idea of desks with little green lamps that have a string to turn it on and off, I've always wanted one. With a sketchbook next to it, and nothing else to do. But I like to do many things,” she shrugs nonchalantly.
I nod along.
“But, it’s a stupid question to ask what I want to be, Because I am, I already am.”
”Yes, but I mean like a career or something, you know.”
“Well, no, I don’t know. And I don’t particularly care.”
“Hmmm interesting”, I take another sip. I respect her rebellious nature.
I look away at the fruit machine with the wording in caps “SIMPLY WILD”. The words are danced around by cherries, stars and other cute and colourful shapes.
“It seems then you know what you like and what you want to do? Right? But what do you want to be?” I say, pressing a little.
“I've told you, I already am. What else to be? What a weird question. You’re not getting it.”
I realise my artist sees me as a boring pompous old fart rule follower.
“I like how you think”, I say, which is true, I do.
“Then do it”, my artist says.
“Do what?”
“Be, silly”.
Interesting idea, to just be, whatever the f that means.
Societal norms, career goals, expectations, labels, is it all nonsense? Is the answer just to be? Is it that simple?
And is that maybe what the whole Artist Date thing is about? Not fixing or forcing creativity, but remembering how to just be. Let things happen as you explore them?
I look at the time and realise I need to go in a minute, but my artist has got me thinking. I have more questions for her.
I chug what's left of my beer.
“Shall we do this another time, next week?” I ask my artist politely.
“How about this weekend?”
“I don’t know if I have time”, I reply.
“Well, you can make time, right?”
Damn, my artist is a smarty-pants little prick, but I like her.
The Artist's Way
Bestselling author Julia Cameron’s book The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity is a 12-week programme for artistic creative recovery. It's aimed at anyone who’s ever felt stuck, self-doubting, or secretly dreamed of making art but didn’t dare call themselves an artist.
Cameron invites “blocked creatives” and “shadow artists” to dust off their imagination, heal old creative wounds, and rediscover the joy of making things just for the fun of it. Emphasizing the idea of creating is good.
Readers are encouraged to try her techniques like Morning Pages, Artist Dates, and affirmations for overcoming creative blocks.
I'm currently finishing my third week of the Artist's Way, and I don't want to say too much about my personal experience yet, until I finish the programme. A good friend and fellow creative recommended it to me, and so far it's been an interesting, and insightful journey, getting to know myself more and break down limiting beliefs.
I will share more when I complete it.
When was the last time you took yourself on a date? Let's chat.
If you’ve ever felt creatively stuck, I’d love to hear from you. Let’s talk about the messy process of making things.
Feel free to reach out to me on Instagram :)
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